The 2024 presidential election motivated me to have a birthday do-over

At the Pittsburgh Ballet Theater Pointe in Time Emerald Gala Today marks a week since my birthday.  Its occurrence is a tremendous blessing. Because all around us are reminders about the fragility of life. To that end, my brother, who always makes a point to celebrate me, took me to the Pittsburgh Ballet Theater's Pointe in Time Emerald Gala on November 2d. That was the beginning of my birthday celebrations. And then, on my birthday itself, I got a bit of a surprise... My actual birthday was tough. It was Election Day. And, I spent the day working polls as a part of an election protection effort. My efforts were designed to protect all voters. However, deep in my heart I love my AKA sister, Kamala Harris and I hoped for her historic victory. Then, much to my chagrin and despite my efforts—and those of thousands more—she lost. In my estimation, that loss was one of the greatest setbacks in human dignity in my lifetime.  The country elected a felon and self-proclaimed, racist, ableis

Be Careful About Dancing at the Work Party...

Working Mom doing "The Wobble" at an event


“We want everyone to be comfortable bringing their ‘whole self to work.’”

If you have participated in any presentations from your company’s inclusion office you know that there is an effort to get people to become more comfortable being their authentic selves at work. Let’s be clear, I am here for it. I think that discrimination against people for unlawful reasons is wrong and should be stopped. I am supportive of the laws being passed to make clear that people can’t be discriminated against for wearing their natural hair, being in a same sex relationship, etc.

"Down with racism!" "Down with sexism!" "Down with ageism!"  You get the picture. I am against all of the “isms”.

Still, I do question whether all of this “comfort” is going too far.

I was recently at a work employee appreciation luncheon. Because it was summer, they were grilling food. I guess somebody thought It would be cool to make it feel like an old school cook out, like at your mama’s house because they hired a DJ. As a working mom, I admired the efficiency of combining work and fun. However, in this case, I think it went too far...



You see, this DJ was L-I-T! He was a singing, rapping, dancing kind of DJ. He kind of reminded me of a Black version of the inappropriate wedding singer in the Hangover, gyrations and all! I’m not sure what he played later in the day. However, when I was there he was playing “The Wobble”, the extended version. If you’re unfamiliar with the song, I’ll share. It is a line dancing song that starts like this, “Hey big girl won’t you back it up. Won’t you back it up!” This DJ was doing the running man enthusiastically encouraging the “big girls” to back it up.


The whole thing got me thinking. I should remind you that I used to practice employment law. So, my mind started wondering things like, “Is it OK that we are referring to women as girls and then calling them big and the asking them to back “it” up??? Perhaps being called big is offensive. Maybe they identify as small. What exactly are the parameters for backing it up at work???”

All that thinking nearly got me worked up in a tizzy.


And while, I did not find comforting answers to my questions, I did know one thing for certain. Even though I LOVE the song and LOVE doing “The Wobble”, there was no way I was dancing to it at my work employee appreciation luncheon. I was comfortable leaving that part of myself at home. After all, it was not my mama’s cookout!



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