A Secret to Success as a Working Mom: Turn Burn Out Into Bliss and Embrace Joy

Last weekend my youngest was committed to going to the "Water Steps" a man-made water fall in Pittsburgh by the rivers. (Fun Fact: Three rivers converge in Pittsburgh--The Ohio River, The Monongahela River, and the Allegheny River.)  He kept asking. I knew he was serious when he said, "If you won't take me, I'll ask  daddy!" Given that it was highly unlikely that would happen on an unscheduled day, I relented. So, we went. It wasn’t planned in the way most things in my life are. No calendar block. No checklist. No “productive” purpose attached. And, so in some respects it was uncomfortable. And yet, it seemed necessary. It was the idea of my 8-year-old—offered with the kind of urgency only children possess when something is profoundly important to them.

Who's good to you might not be best for you...

I have learned a great deal lately from my experiences and those of women who are close to me. Below are some of my reflections:

One of the hardest love lessons to learn is that someone can be a good person, a good boyfriend even, but still not be right for you. In other words, you don't have to villify him in order to validate your decision. To believe otherwise negates your ability to make sound decisions.

You may decide that you're better off without him. However, when you're lying in your bed alone, you may question your wisdom. You may think about his good qualities and conclude that your recognition of his goodness means that you must have made a mistake. However, when commenting about a friend's situation, my boyfriend commented, "It's not about who's "nice", it's about who's best for a lifetime. Sometimes you have to make tough decisions."

The thing is, you have the right to create the life that you want to lead. Creating that life however, requires a great deal of strength. Sometimes you must have the courage to walk away from a good person in order to find a great relationship.

Unfortunately, I have also learned that it is much easier to describe courage than to demonstrate it...
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