Comments about the Newtown Connecticut Tragedy From a Working Mom: It’s the End of the World as We know it
The world did not end on December 21, 2012. However, on
December 14th of last year our world changed forever. Just when it
was beginning to feel like Christmas there was a shooting at an elementary
school in Newtown, Connecticut that changed everything. There were dozens of
children killed along with educators and the school principal. The magnitude of
the tragedy and the ages of the majority of the victims brought our country to
our knees.
A Year Later, We Have No Answers
Each of those killed meant the world to somebody. And their
absence left a tremendous void. The survivors have holes in their hearts that
will never heal. And the rest of us remain confused and outraged.
The tragedy raised many questions for which we still have no
answers. What kind of sick son of a bitch commits mass murder? How could
anybody target innocent children? And how do we continue to live and have peace
when this tragedy remains a possibility?
Even a year later, we still have no answers. While anyone
with a heart was moved by the tragedy, we process our grief differently.
How Do We Prevent this From Happening Again?
Some have morphed this into a constitutional debate about
the right to bear arms. It has become a liberty issue. Coming from a family who
started one of the first African-American gun clubs in the country, I can
appreciate the liberty issue. However, while
that is a related issue, that debate is off topic.
The debate should be about how do we preserve life? The
Declaration of Independence says that our nation was founded on the principles
that “all men” should be entitled to pursue “life, liberty, and the pursuit of
happiness” in that order. We should note that we cannot pursue liberty, or
enjoy our freedoms, without life. For that reason, the only relevant question
after this extraordinary tragedy is how do we preserve life?
Figuring out how to preserve life, making it more difficult for dangerous people to obtain fire arms and harm more innocent people is one way to make this unspeakable tragedy have even greater meaning.
All Parents Were Moved By the Tragedy
Like most parents, the tragedy hit me at my core. There are times when I embrace my daughter tightly
with tears in my eyes. I inhale her sweet scent. Stroke her hair and pause. It hits me that she isn’t much younger than those
twenty children who lost their lives that day. Those children were simply and
innocently living their lives in the midst of their regular routine.
They were
attending Sandy Hook Elementary school. They did not return home that day and never will again. Each of those children was somebody’s baby and they were deeply loved.
As I write this, I learn that a student in Colorado opened
fire at school as well. What we want most as parents is to protect our children.
However, things like working, bathing, and eating interfere with our ability to
be with them all of time. And even if we were able to be with them, we are human and suffer from the
limitations of that condition. What we want to do most of all is largely out of
our control. The reality of that is sobering and can be maddening if you let
it.
Remember to Cherish Every Moment With Your Children
We cannot change what happened, but we can change our own lives. We owe it to the families directly affected by
the Newtown tragedies and to ourselves to celebrate lives and our blessings.
The pageantry and commercialism of the holidays have both
captivated me and disgusted me for years. However, in light of the tragedy, I
view them differently. Last Christmas
season and this Christmas season I am aware that tomorrow is not promised. If
you watch the local news for more than two minutes at night you are reminded
that the world is concomitantly a violent and a beautiful place. There are
massacres, natural disasters, and accidents that interrupt our lives and make
the unthinkable a reality for too many families.
The pageantry of Christmas—the carols, the decorations, the
cartoons—it all matters. It exists to remind us that this is a special time and
magic is possible. It reminds us that in
the midst of tragedies are traditions that have been passed on for generations
and that those traditions provide us with comfort. They also provide our
children with precious memories.
Cherish the time that you have with your children, every
moment. Even if your family is blessed to be spared a tragedy, those moments
are still gone much too soon.
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