One Secret to Working Mom Success: Remember to Love the Journey

At The Hotel Breakers in Sandusky, Ohio/Photo Credit: Kathryn Helcamp

"Life is made of moments, small pieces of silver amidst long stretches of tedium. It would be wonderful if they came to us unsummoned, but particularly in lives as busy as the ones most of us lead now, that won't happen. We have to teach ourselves now to live, really live...to love the journey, not the destination." A Short Guide to Happy Life, Anna Quindlen

Sometimes our lessons are found in elevators as opposed to fortune cookies...

I ran into a woman I know casually on the elevator one Friday while leaving work. I must have been a sight to behold. I was attempting to juggle my purse, laptop and pizza. Also, in the interest of full disclosure I had a bottle of vodka and red wine because I work across from a Wine and Spirits store and it was the weekend, baby!

She asked me about my "child". I told her that I actually have three now and shared their ages. She looked at me, laughed and said, "Don't worry it will get better in about 18 years!" When she said that the only thing I could think of was, "Really?! WTH!!! Is that your advice???

Being a Working Mom is Hard, But We Have to Enjoy the Journey

People makes these types of statements because they think they're being witty. However, the comments are neither witty nor appropriate. Here's why. If she legitimately thought I needed encouragement, she missed the mark.  My kids range from nearly 8 to 8 months. So, I have lots of living to do between now and eighteen years from now. Waiting eighteen years to get the carrot is hardly a motivator. Mom's in need of encouragement need help now!"

Note to moms who need help now: It can get better tomorrow. As the bible says, "Weeping endures for a night but joy comes in the morning." I know that when I have felt overwhelmed it is because I have believed the lie. I have believed that "I am stuck and it doesn't get any better than this." The reality is, life always has the potential to get better. You just have to keep believing.

The photographs in this posts were taken in Sandusky, Ohio. (Pittsburghers if you haven't visited there, let me give you a spoiler alert. IT IS BEAUTIFUL! The Hotel Breakers is a beachfront property with spectacular views. It is also next to Cedar Point Amusement Park--home of the most roller coasters in the world--to boot.) We visited there for a conference three years ago for the first time and we will keep returning.

At The Hotel Breakers in Sandusky, Ohio/Photo Credit: Kathryn Helcamp

Schedule the Fun Despite the Hassles, It's Worth It!

Getting to the conference was a bit of an ordeal. One, traveling anywhere with three kids is a lot, especially when one of them is one eight months old. Getting ready generally involves thrown up, sweat and tears... Also, the day before this photo was taken I was livid with my husband. He made us leave much later than I wanted and I was worried that we would miss out of fun. I questioned whether it was worth all of the effort.

Then, I was reminded that life always gets better. 

The very next day, it got better. I strengthened my connections with a few folks and I met a photographer who captured these amazing memories with my kids--for free. I love the photographs. And the experienced reminded me that we have no idea what amazing things are in store.

Here's the thing that the well intentioned older mom may not have realized. I am not raising my kids so that I can simply send them out into the world at eighteen. I am not counting down the days until my intense mothering time is over. And, I am not complaining about it...too much. Instead, I am enjoying the fact that I have the immense privilege of spending time with these precious gifts that God has given me. I recognize that I have a lot on my plate, but this life is mine. And it is amazing!