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| Working mom and kids |
According to a recent study by Oregon University, a happy home life can result in an increase in immersion and productivity, leading to a happier work life. See
The holidays were about focusing on the positive. And, I totally agree with that. However, I recognize that life can be hard. And because of that, we all need coping skills.
A few weeks ago, I quoted the above study in a training I conducted and encouraged the participants to become happier outside of work so that they might be more productive at work. To be fair, I don't deny the results of the study referenced above. Of course, people who are happy with the home lives make better workers. Saying that is the equivalent of saying that people who are in good shape look better in swimsuits. DUH! However, what that study doesn't reflect is the working mom's capacity to compartmentalize.
The question becomes though, can one succeed at work if they are struggling in his/her personal life?
Spoiler Alert: The Answer is, "Hell Yes"!
It is possible to succeed at work in spite of problems at home, and it is healthy.
Working moms have to go to work after fighting with their spouses, getting thrown up on, getting pooped on and after observing their kids melt into a puddle of tears because they were so upset that mommy was leaving. We have to go to work after having to deal with the consequences of our others' bad decisions that we have to clean up. We have to go to work after feeling the disappointment of losing a pregnancy, after the frustrations or not getting pregnant, and after we spill coffee on ourselves en route and don't have time to go home to change. That is why many working moms wear black--a lot.
We are going to work in spite of it all and our employers are none the wiser because we make it work.Indeed, there have been times when I have had to go to work after experiencing impossible indignities and challenges in my house. And when I arrived at work, after cleaning up the mess and applying my makeup, I had a smile and I performed.
Working moms recognize that being unemployed would only compound the issues listed above. We understand that our family won't be able to pay the mortgage without our paycheck. And, we also value the respite that comes from work. If we are fortunate, we work in jobs consistent with our training and education. That means that we are competent at them. Hell, we even excel at them. We are valued for what we do and we are compensated for it. That reality is far better than a lot of people have.
Listen, I get it. The weight of everything can be tremendous--especially at the beginning of year when the challenges of home are compounded by the weather and by everyone else being inspired by their resolutions and raving about how refreshed they are after the holidays. In spite of it all, remember, life as you know it, remains good. So, when things seem bad, even when things are bad, don't mess up your job because you are having problems at home.
Things always get better.
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